Be A Man

A Man can only become a determined man once they realize that almost all normal human interaction occurs based on some basic rules of human action:

1. People tend to perform actions purposefully.
2. People tend to want more of something rather than less.
3. People tend to want something sooner rather than later.

This is true for everyone, even when we do seemingly altruistic things such as charity work or offering a donation. It even possesses us often when we’re doing work in our faith. When a Man realizes that we all work based on these rules, he is able to give himself an advantage in being able to make sure every interaction he is involved in gives him some benefit.

The determined Man desires to reverse these rules for himself, or at least mask them from the perspective of the other person:

1. The determined Man will not offer or reveal the purpose of his action.
2. The determined Man will not be in a rush to get something.
3. The determined Man will not be looking to take more than he needs or wants.

Accepting these changes in my life was very difficult, especially since I was trying to change myself across the board: in love, in business and in casual relationships with others (friends and family). I failed often, not realizing that I needed to focus myself in the areas that I had the most problems in. At the time that I came up with these realizations, I was doing ok in business, I didn’t have much trouble with friends and family, but I was severely lacking in the love department. Looking back over the years, though, I can see now that I was lacking in the other areas, I just hadn’t realized it.

Many of my readers of this site have come here because of the need for dating advice — and I do believe that is one of the weakest areas for most men. Yet it is important to realize that the problems you might have in dating are bringing down your life in almost every other area. Instead of being the determined Man, the hawk, you’re likely closer to the insecure Man, the chicken.

When it comes to women, especially in the dating phase, it amazes me how often I see guys repeatedly making the same mistakes. The laws of human action above don’t directly dictate how we should act when it comes to women, but they all fall into place once we realize what the woman’s intentions really are. They’re not what you see in Hollywood or on TV, they’re not what you read about on the cover of a woman’s magazine at a grocery store. In fact, they’re the complete opposite of what most women seem to think their intentions are. Women are designed differently than men, and it is important to reprogram your beliefs so that you understand them. Not only will it help your love life, but it will set up the rest of your relationships to offer better successes for you, with less stress and much less work.

Starting later today (Friday) and continuing next week, I’ll start offering real advice to help mold the insecure Man into the determined Man, starting with the perspective of how to handle the elusive and confusing woman. After a few articles, you’ll likely have a new perspective on past failures, current problems, and the future. Once you tackle this seemingly impossible target (the woman), you’ll find yourself changing your life in every other relationship as well.

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