At our Be A Man discussion forum, a regular reader made a comment that caused me to have to go back and edit about 50 future articles — a reader directly caused me to realize a mistake I had to change in my own head regarding the way I live my life. It doesn’t change me one bit, and it doesn’t even change those who have followed my advice for the past decade, but it does change how I “sell” the reader on the ideals I put forward. The mistake I made is not explaining who I am writing to. I am not writing about wives or your own business or dealing with permanent structures in your life — I am writing about how to take a temporary situation (a girlfriend, a job, etc), filter out the losers, and find the one you want to make permanent (the wife, your business, etc).

LexNaturalis made the comment I don’t do it because Hollywood says that it’s the thing to do, nor because society thinks it’s the thing to do, but because I personally believe it’s the right thing to do which was a huge clue to reminding me who I am writing about. Lex is in a great marriage, so part of the permanent situation is to now make sure that the needs of both parties are met — yours and hers (or in the case of your own business, your needs as well as what the business needs). Yet before the relationship is made permanent, it is very important to filter out the junk and be left with the truth of what the other person wants. My previous article stands strong when one realizes I was writing about girlfriends (and bosses), not wives and self-employment. Thanks, Lex, for the insight and the correction — it took me 3 weeks to go through everything and reinvestigate my premises.

Looking back at the previous Be A Man article, it is also obvious to me that this article can be targeted at some married men (maybe even most). If your marriage is shaky, it might be due to the fact that it is not a permanent relationship. You may have entered a relationship without realizing the truth behind your partner or yourself, and I will definitely have a long series on fixing marriages by following the advice I give to men who are dating (or are having problems dating). A marriage can be fixed, but it requires that a Man become a hawk-man rather than a chicken-man, which is where many married men find themselves.

Now that I’ve fixed my future topics, I will start posting again on a very regular basis. Thanks again to my readers who are also co-authors in many of my posts.